Main Street Observations
by SteveBSteveB weighs in (ha!) with his observations from Main St. Arts Festival. Read more of his observations on weighty issues at his website: Fort Worth Blogorrhea. -Pete W.
Fort Worth is a city in transformation, as we all see daily. After a couple of days at the Main Street Arts Festival, I’m not sure were changing for the best. What I saw were legions of cowering otiose simps. Bold statement, you say? Allow me to present my case.
Photo by timyates
No longer are the streets of our dear city filled with nubile women and virile men. Speaking for the men, Main St. used to be a place where one’s neck would hurt the next day as a result of all the head-turners peppering the streets. Now everyone is just plain fat. Me included. We need to stop installing steak-houses downtown and start putting in more gyms.
But the most egregious offense against taste and decency was not the morbid obesity, it’s the trend towards the un-ambulatory dog. I was shocked…shocked by how many near-hairless canines were being carried up and down the street. And to break the stereotype, most were carried by men. Emasculated men, to be sure. Of what use is a dog that doesn’t walk?
To assuage my dour feelings of the state of affairs in Fort Worth, I need only four words. They were from Dallas.
Tags: downtown, essays, events, festivals, main street arts festival
3 Comments, Comments or Pings
Don Young
There is hope for “otiose simps” and other souls groping for a meaningful life. Come to Prairie Fest, dudes! You’ll get a healthy workout just walking from your car to the site, unless you let one of the beefy guys from Go Green Taxi Pedicabs pedal you from your car. Take a master naturalist-led wildflower tour and you will begin to understand why it’s called Tandy HILLS. Expand your mind with Footprints, a new performance piece by Lori Soderbergh and Tammy Gomez. Let our 75 environmentally conscious exhibitors point the way to healthy living. Even our beer is healthy. Plus we have the maniacs from Brave Combo kickin’ ass.
Best of all, Prairie Fest is proud to NOT be sponsored by Chesapeake, XTO, Devon or any other dirty energy companies.
See you this Saturday.
Apr 21st, 2008
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